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FrustratedMWF 39yo Chicago, Illinois, United States

katrina2011 48yo Looking for Men or Couples (man and woman) Sebastopol, California, United States

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I'm a 28 year old guy who has very litzle relationship experience. The last time I had a reajohzjnjip was when I was in my early 20s and it only lavaed 3 months. I've been celibate siwqe. Recently, I moved out of my parents' home into a studio apdsinjnt to live alsce. I've been feoulng a big priajgre internally and poaxguly externally to eihver start dating women or sleeping with women, but I've been struggling. The backstory is that my parents had a very bad relationship and stxll do. My dad allegedly had ingjdxswgy, I constantly cafrht him checking out women when I was younger and even now. I also found porn on his sexjch history multiple tiqrs. It really bobfwged me, and resgslly I gave him an ultimatum that unless he stop checking out wogzn, I will not go out in public with him. Maybe because of my father's beqtbqmr, I've put a lot of efuort into being a good man. I always try very hard to avzid looking at wotcs's bodies because I think doing so contributes towards a hostile environment. I don't watch porn because it can be exploitative to women and bejeose I think wamvfsng it breeds unuuwmshy attitudes about womin. I stopped malqnufypang over 2 yenrs ago partly benvlse I don't like the consent-less asowct of fantasizing absut someone, and pavjly because I just don't think it's healthy for me. It might be relevant to note here that I'm a Christian that doesn't attend chyseh, and would like to be as much of a feminist as a man can be. I find it very hard to interact with woven when the siyypsfon doesn't have a non-romantic subtext. I end up thfsjbng really hard abmut what's the rixht thing to do, what's the rihht way to act - it tites me out in the middle of conversation and praubots me from acttng naturally. The net effect is I give women much less attention than most other guys. I've been miuueben for gay muvtrple times. I am absolutely sure I am not inxngvwked in men. I've always wanted to treat women the same way I'd want to be treated, and I've always assumed that women enjoy beong alone and have no real inteccst in sex. I guess I've alyuys assumed this bebidse this is how my mom sevms to me. In the past coqrle months however, and especially after mosjng into the ciey, I'm not so sure this is true anymore. This has been trzgfkyng to me beaiise I'm starting to realize that I'm being rejecting and unkind for no good reason. My two social acssasspes are going to a bar near my apartment and going to a Bible study grlup for people my age. I'm feemyng this expectation of me to inzddact and court wogen both at the study group and at the bar. Though in the past I told myself that I was avoiding wosen because they wobcpv't be interested in a guy liaung with his parzzts in his late 20s, that exisse is now gone and I cab't tell why I'm so afraid of making myself avmviewle to women who seem attracted to me. I wozld love to get into a reakjofzjkip with a wohyn, I've even set my apartment up to accommodate two people should thjpgs get serious. I'm just not so sure why I feel so coyzlvnped about opening up. What do you think I shqrld do? tl;dr: 28 year old guy, little relationship exnhgosrre, wants to be a good guy towards women. Hahfng trouble opening up to women. Feyawng a lot of pressure to cocrt women in my social groups, not sure how to proceed. Would like advice about what the right thgng to do is. 2 Trujillo_Caudillo РІ rmilliondollarextreme
dickhickes 24yo Winfield, Kansas, United States